How To Save A Life Buggered iPod

The Prologue
i'm a gadget-hungry girl. i always have been. once upon a time, when a beloved walkman died, it was with mixed emotion that i hauled out its sad carcass, as i knew that buying a new one was just around the corner. omnomnom gadgetsssss. in fact, the last walkman i ever bought was a panasonic (i was always a panasonic girl) silver slim thing and it was gorgeous and i loved it, even though it cost £70.

but i'm 27 now, and have literally put thousands of pounds into the great gadget economy since i was a frivolous teen. purchase choice now is now made with a priority of:

function

PRICE

style

trend

curiosity

this is why, although i love music and have a wonderful mp3 collection that stretches back years, i only use for my portable music, a 2nd Generation iPod Nano 4GB (which as we know, translates into 3.67GB usable space). i love it dearly, but recently felt the need for greater capacity. so i turned to eBay.

i bought myself a 20GB 4th Gen iPod for just under £40. cosmetically very good condition, apparently new battery fitted recently and everything was hunky/dory.

so, beloved newOld iPod worked for about half a day and then screwed up in the middle of a sync: click click whirrrrr. argh. click click clunk. arrrrgh. much trying to format bad sectors later, i got the awful "folder/support" icon. frantically opened it up once or twice to try the *slap* trick and it eventually spat out a "sad ipod" icon. cause of all this: Hard Drive Fail. after fighting down the gollum-like urge to buy a brand new iPod touch, i ordered a new HDD, flexed my geekgirl tech muscles and jumped right into to replacing the hard drive myself.

>> Not bored yet? Read the bit where i fixed it, got the girl and saved the day...

The Fixing Bit
okok, i tired you enough already. don't worry, though - it's real easy to run through the actual steps. lucky for me, i stumbled on this great guide by Josh Highland, without this i would've had to piece the steps together myself - many thanks!

1: Find A Buggered iPod

well, i was lucky enough to have my iPod brick on me without (much) provocation, but if you want to play along at home, you might have to hunt around for your own cream-crackered iPod. this should be easy enough, as apple's build quality and internal design is a bit sketchy at best (ouch, steve jobs. ouch.), specifically in the older models. (1st-4th gen iPods)

1a: How Do I Know My iPod Is iBuggered?

oh, well, the buggeration of an old iPod can manifest itself in seemingly infinite symptoms. firstly, and i didn't realise it when i used mine on monday, a hard drive that's on the way out can make some pretty loud noises as it seeks the data. other signs that your iPod may not be long for this mortal coil: wigging out in the middle of songs, skipping randomly, not syncing properly (although this may be a bad mp3 file, you know) all of these culminating in the classic "folder" icon on your lcd display, and eventually the dreaded "sad iPod icon". in my case, i first had misgivings when it wouldn't sync past about 10GB of music. ¬_¬

2: Get a New HDD

this is easy peasy. find a good retailer on eBay and get yourself the appropriate model. my 4th generation takes the MK2004GAL model, but i could also use the 2006 HDD that was used in the 4th gen iPod Photos. it cost £25 with p&p included, and was shipped via special delivery. a good retailer will send it out through a good postal service as it's important to know it'll be well looked after en route - HDDs are finicky little things.

3: Get Your Tools Together

for this experiment, you will need, to whit:

1 x pen knife or other thin implement (fnar, fnar)
1 x iPod
1 x firewire cable/wall charger (v. necessary)
1 x usb cable if you haven't got a firewire port to sync through with your pc/mac/etc (optional)
1 x guitar plectrum
1 x spanky new HDD
1 x courage (abundance of)

set everything out nice and neat so you feel like you're special. oh, here's a tip: chances are when your hdd was dying, your battery was running out like a mo' fo' too, as the bloody thing keeps trying to restart and restart, so you'll need some means of charging your iPod. if you don't have a wall charger (or firewire cable/port), get one. you'll need it for when your iPod restores. i have no idea why usb won't work - something to do with the older models, i presume.

4: Open Up Your iPod
- this is the very unorthodox bit -

this is by far the trickiest bit, i found. i looked a bit online, and found that this guy's method is a better description of events than i could give, so pop off and read it and come back. anyway - the case was so tight i did have to make a wee dent in my metal backing with a pen knife to make room for my Ani DiFranco plectrum to squeeze between the metal back and front cover. you should also remember to put your iPod on hold, because you'll end up switching the damn' thing on later if you're not careful.

5: Have A Rummage

time to be careful careful now, lay everything out - and take great pains not to disconnect anything by accident! i'm talking battery wires (botom right of the main case), headphone jack/hold connectors (glued to the rear backing) and hdd cables (at the top of your hdd).

6: Take Out Your Old HDD

look at the top of the hdd. you can see the black bit that's connecting the hdd to the ipod logic board. if you lift up your cowardly old hdd using the top connector as a hinge (CAREFULLY), you'll see that it's attached via a ribbon (which appears to be randomly taped to the logic board, i mean wtf?), just like a teeny tiny fairy-like IDE cable. aww. so, carefully remove this cable from the top of the hdd - it'll just come loose using a bit of pressure. you now have the very essence - essence, i say - of iPoddery in your hands. oooooOOOOooh.

O HAI: if your hard drive is not completely fux0red, removing and reattaching the ide cable may help to restore your iPod back to full health, so you may be able to avoid replacing the costly hdd altogether by reassembling the iPod after doing this and trying it - you never know, it just might work.

7: Rubber Up

now that your old hdd is safely out of the way, you can take the funky blue padding off it by gently coaxing it off, and gently uncoaxing it onto the new drive. it should fit nice and snug - and do try to remember which way round it all goes.

next, use your guitar pick (or the lovely josh suggested one of those razor thingies you use to get the paint off've shiny surfaces) and patiently sort of scrape the last bit of foam off the body of the hard drive.

josh also suggests sticking this lot back onto the new hdd with a spot of glue, but there was enough adhesive still on the foam for me to keep it in place - not to mention my concerns at melting glue with the hella heat that comes off these old iPods!


8: Whack It In, I Say!

ooooh so close! right, so re-attach the hdd cable to the new hdd. they belong together, they're soulmates, they are. so... yeah. press it gently into position.

9: Close It Up

now, carefully close your iPod case again, and try to think positive thoughts as you attach it to your pc.

10: Restore (or "Hold Your Breath And Cross Your Fingers")
so... iTunes will have a look at your iPod, and hopefully it'll be obsessing about restoring it. that's fine, it's a natural urge. let it restore it. now, if you've got firewire (and all goes to plan) it should finish the restore and be telling you the iPod will be restarting (and that the dialog will close in 10 seconds) or something like that. if you don't, it'll want connecting into a wall charger to complete the restore. once you've done all this, you should see a wee status bar on the screen of your (now-happy) iPod. everything good. if you kept it connected to the firewire all this time, as i did, once you've selected your language on the iPod and checked your "about" bit in the settings to make sure all is well, you'll need to disconnect the iPod from the poot and reconnect it before iTunes will look at it properly and give it a name.

i named mine "iPob". and i love it.

Mad Blunted Jazz

Listening To: the pipes that run through my bathroom.
Wondering About: how to swallow my britishness and talk myself up in my forthcoming site.

if i was a topical blogger, i could remark on any number of things that have occured recently. luckily, this is more of a space to let the head unwind, and very few global issues trouble me sorely before i go to sleep at night, whereas small, personal problems vex me hugely. like when i'm going to turn the mattress over to avoid the sticky-uppy spring. also the state of my bedroom wall troubles me. i'm a very immediate worrier; it would take me quite a run-up to worry about anything bigger than this house.

lucky for you, gentle reader, that i'm in a relaxed mood, hey?

i have noticed (she said, fussing irritably with her duvet) that "mobile technology" and "wireless" can so often be synonyms for "uncomfortable body" and "awkward hands in process of aquiring rsi". while there's something about this wireless concept that makes me go a little crazy, carrying my acer round the house from room to room tucked proudly under my arm, once i finally rest myself and prepare to browse/view/read/work, i find that conventional furniture is not built for such activities. my mother spent a good two hours of net-time on this acer a few nights ago (while i attempted to interest her in my new copy of police squad. it's hard being an only child) and she adopted several increasingly tortured positions whilst browsing. she enjoyed herself immensely though, so i don't know what that says, really.

i'm not going to speculate further, though, on how the body may change to suit technology rather than the other way around, because that lends itself to yet another distopian slant, and i think there's far too much of that going on these days.

Do Androids Dream Of: being mechanical sausage rolls
I, Wireless: my dog has just walked straight over the top of me. more fool me?
Yes, Of Course I'm Happy About: the black guy getting in. but i'm always looking for The Catch. i'm suspicious of anyone who seems too good to be true...
Horoscope Angst: "It takes a lot less energy to explore the unknown than you might think." - no it doesn't. change is tiring. and tedious. and unsettling. i wish everything could stay the same. forever. especially the internet.

Carpel Tunnel Syndrome

Listening To: the dog, snoring.
Thinking About: what i'm going to watch as i work today - it's a choice between Animaniacs and Weeds. Oddly, i find Animaniacs too distracting to have on while i work.

blackboards are fun. everyone wanted to be the blackboard wiping-off type person, way back in The Learning Years. i've found that this tight little thrill of misplaced responsibilty can be yours again, by purchasing a cheap-as-chips child's blackboard and chalk set from your nearest seller of tat. ostensibly, the blackboard is an innovative way for me to design code without using up reams of the world's natural resources. it's true, i code faster than they can replace the rainforests, although i'm sure my clients would disagree with me there. so, answer to the problem: blackboard.

i'm thinking about getting a whiteboard so the ethnic balance is maintained. ha. ha.

but enough of this edgy post-ironic humour.

i've been out and about again (still no free wi-fi in my favourite bar yet though, boo hiss) just to prove to myself that there is an outside world, athough i'm still not convinced that it's any better than the world inside my head.

in this time of solid work, my brief excursions into the (alleged) Real World prove many interesting points:

1) girls are as silly when they grow up as they are when they're silly girl-children.
2) people consume way too much alcohol in this nation. a few nights ago, the Gang spent two hours observing a young lady repeatedly falling over and staggering gracelessly from one side of the pavement to the other. she was bouncing around like a humourous bouncing thing when some (presumably) kind gentleman ushered her into a taxi. go Team Alcohol UK.
3) Things are expensive, but i like to buy Things anyway.
4) a squishy mushroom keyring is a foolish thing to buy when one owns a dog that is only happy when it's chewing.
5) i hate paying taxes.

Sitting, Waiting, Wishing: that my router would stop playing silly buggers
Bathroom Author Of The Hour: Terry Pratchett.

Chocolate Box

Pondering: the purposeless of headaches
Marvelling At: the unbelievably precise timing of said headaches

i took to the road at the weekend and high-tailed it into the nearest city with my Acer. the original mandate was to seek out the wi-fi spots in town and get drunk at the same time.

perhaps before i bundled up my beloved netbook into its car seat and put on spongebob squarepants to keep it quiet during the journey, i should have considered the following:

1) i have pretty bad luck with plans of the best-laid variety
2) i haven't had a drink for two weeks, so i got distracted from my task almost instantly
3) cate blanchett feels it in her water

when i awoke many hours later in a state of mild dehydration, i checked my bleary-eyed emails - clearly for sheer novelty factor as there were three other computers in the room with me - and it must have been at this point that i got distracted by colourful things and left the netbook on with no power-saver in place and eventually the battery went into a deep, peaceful sleep.

the rest of the day was plagued with bars offering free wi-fi. the bastards.

Lessons Learnt: netbook is light enough to fit in bag. users brain also light enough to fit in bag. attention span small enough to fit in wallet
Shiny Things Happened To Be: infuriatingly colourful anime of the baffling variety

Flagstaff's Abstract

Overtime: ridiculous amounts
Made Possible By: sacrificing what little is left of my social life

i'm awash with technology.

surrounded by my gizmos, i have so much gadgetry that my room/office/nest is starting to look like Joe Pantoliano's code haven in future-gone-wrong, google-has-taken-over-the-world distopian epic The Matrix. you may have heard of it.

in truth, it's more like Jamie Bell's desert cubby-den in Jumper (yes, i did like that movie, thank you, and i make no apologies), only there's no sand/london buses/Darth Vader The Early Years and i'm a girl, not a dancer. but i digress.

i'm beginning to feel akin to someone who was mildly starved in their childhood and is suddenly thrust into a world where all-you-can-eat chinese buffet is the norm. that is to say, everything on offer is such a novelty that i instinctively want it, but i can't work up the energy to care because i'm already stuffed. with chips. silicon chips. because of food being a metaphor for technology. remember?

so... following my own dogged, if haphazard, train of thought: the new fuji desktop in april was my main course, the lumix in the summer was a fondue pudding thing, and this netbook is like cheese and nuts. my pda was snacking between meals, and my iPod nano was a wartime banana.

i sometimes wonder if i lack structure.

Listening To: the trundle of a happy dishwasher (or maybe it's plotting my distopian demise, who knows?)
Resisting: M&S Sponge Cake

Easy Muffin

Enjoying: the first cup of tea of the day. which is the best, as we all know
Listening To: my noisy fan kicking in at 70 degrees

i'm beginning to see the world from a linux point of view.

two weeks ago, i chose a linux-powered netbook because i thought to myself "beth, old girl", because i've been reading a lot of Wodehouse recently, "i think it's time we took the plunge and became the UberGeek."

first impressions were marred by the toybox linpus that acer have stuck on here for the doofuses of the world, but a quick tinker later and the thing was looking especially purdy and sleek. everything seems quicker in linux. the bootup is 30s. and there's something about all this free software that i love love love. there's other good points, but i'll save them for a rainy journal day as i'm in danger of losing my (potential, but not proven) audience.

in conclusion, i may be on the brink of letting slip the slang "windoze" into my day-to-day vocabulary; i'm positively bustling with indignation over which major developers do and do not support linux distros; i'm using linux words like "distros" without shame.

all of this does not equate to the fact that i feel any affection for that fat penguin thing linux uses as a subliminal underdog message. i'm not a "mascot" girl, i'm not a "hey kawaii bandwagon for meeee" geekgirl following her socially retarded boyfriend from comic shop to comic shop with a vacant smile, and i prefer helvetica to comic sans.

but if i was all of the above, it would take a lot more than a fat penguin representing an operating system to tickle these bios.

Loving: the pale glimmer of light through my dusty blinds
Hating: being too lazy to dust my blinds